13 reasons why review

Everything out there on the web regarding this series is negative. Yes this is a very real and very traumatic series full of many topics covered in this series, not many want to acknowledge and talk about. Bullying, rape, low self esteem, drug and alcohol dependant issues, and most importantly suicide, just to name a few.
I found out my son who is 11 watched it and when I seen the many news reports and articles stating how aweful it was I had to be the judge of it myself.
Me being a 3 times suicide survivor, it was yes difficult to watch, full of triggers and I had to take breaks and use coping skills (use all senses to bring calming effects) to get through the series. I managed very well. With small breaks here and there it got me through.
Also a cutter point of view I haven't cut since fall 2015 and yes it was trigger city for that part of my life and impulsive part of my mentality. But again coping skills and breaks helped me make it through.
I walked away with the realization of the effects on those left behind and the torment each person involved in my life could face the ultimate question...did I cause this to happen?
The tapes just give that inner walk through as to why she felt that despair that lead to the ultimate decision to end her life so traumatically. Did not seem to glorify suicide as many articles indicate IMHO.
Now mentality is important when watching this series take breaks use coping skills when triggered. And when done do watch the following 13 reasons why: beyond the reasons if you didn't watch it before starting the series which also may help process what is going to be watched or what was just watched. I watched it after and I must say I got everything they were trying to portray in the series. It was well scripted and well casted as well as at capturing the struggles teens face these days to open the door to be able to talk about such topics to hopefully take suicide off the table as a solution to such experiences.

*Spoiler alert* (continue to *End of spoiler* to avoid reading the spoiler)

Episode 1 leaves Clay hallucinating/flash back and ending up angry at the first person who Hannah claimed they had hurt her in a way that left her wanting to die. And as the episodes drone on and on flash back to present to daydreaming what Clay would like to do but turns out he didn't on numbers occasions he does finally act out and you think it's another day dream, but turns out he actually lost his cool and exposed a realization of what goes on at school as well as gets a full confession needed to serve justice to one of the characters. It's hard to differentiate between daydream, actual happenings, and flashbacks at first which kept me on my toes.
I highly recommend watching this with your teenagers especially if they have signs of depression, as well as suicide, and cutting but do take breaks when the show gets heavy and discuss and use coping skills to get through them.
Highly recommend watching beyond the reasons first as it helps break down and yes gives away the series but puts you in the right mind set and to prepare yourself for what is to come and determine if you do wanna walk down this journey through what is left behind once someone does kill themselves the struggles the parents face blaming themselves, as well as torturing themselves to try and figure out why and if they caused it etc. As well as friends and acquaintances.
Hopefully this series does as it is intended and that is taking suicide off the table as an option, and not glorify suicide.

*End of spoiler*

Okay. So I walked personally away with the realization that suicide should never be an option even if the thought comes from time to time, if I just hold on and use my coping skills it will pass soon just gotta hold on for a bit...and if it never passes I call someone to talk to them if no one I know answers and the thoughts are still there I call the suicide help line. Cognitive Behavior Therapy has helped me cope with the droning on and on thoughts of running away and committing suicide. I have a safety plan and in that heat of that moment when it is so strong that I see no other way, it is so hard to not give in and just do it. but even if I stall for just a moment sometimes it just passes if I give it a second or two sometimes a few minutes but once I regain that control I can follow through with my safety plan. I haven't attempted suicide since 2006? rough guess...anyway. I am proud I have overcame moments of despair between there and now and no it wasn't easy. Many phone calls to my therapist to talk me down or a friend or suicide hotline but I made it through. You have to fight for your life when you are in this cycle of despair...I know you may not see anything worth living for and that in this instance this trial you are facing doesn't seem like it will end EVER but it will. Sometimes you need to change something in your life to make it pass...so don't give up and think this is the last chapter of your life cuz believe me with what all I have been through if I can get through everything I have anyone can. Believe me I am not strong at all...I had to make myself stronger over the years with each chapter I want to end soon as it unfolds...but I did it! I made it thus far! You can to!

For those who have a loved one who is suicidal or has committed suicide, its a dark dark place and its easy to put on a smiling face and act like everything is fine. To tell how they are doing well when they aren't. You need to contact a counselor to get insight as to how to approach your suicidal loved one and what to say and not to say. And for those who lost a loved one to suicide I am so sorry you are faced with this tremendous loss. Their suffering in their mind was so great that they just couldn't see any other way to end it. It is not easy and its going to be a long journey for you to process the loss be sure to seek therapy as the urges to follow suit will come and you will need a strong support people in your life to help you through these moments of despair you may face following the suicide of a loved one.

I am going to end this with a thought. Life is so short already, we don't need to end it sooner than later. You are going to get through all your trials whether you want to or not you just gotta give it time, or change something and do something about it. You definitely need to change the way you think...ie. tire went flat on your bike=oh man I may as well just kill myself....NO....go out get a new tube and change the tire. just as an example of how something so minor can cause someone to want to end it all...this form of thinking with each breakup, each job loss, each car breakdown, each time a friend cancels plans, etc. has to end. There is a silver lining to every storm cloud and a rainbow to follow each storm, you just gotta hold on and let it pass. Maybe help it to pass on by finding something either to distract yourself or to get where you want to be because what you are doing right now needs overhauled into being what you want out of life...make it happen! But don't kill yourself.

Thanks for reading.

Sincerely,

Rabeka Jo

Pokemon Go Fest July 22, 2017

First off I wanna let ya'll know I did not go to Chicago and my opinions on this are only speculation via the 6:52:32 Video they uploaded to their channel.

OK so I noticed in the video they have music playing in the background the entire time. Now they invited tons of YouTube channel people to the event even paid for hotels, flights, and tickets to get in. Now given the YouTube community guidelines we are not allowed to upload anything with copyright music in your videos otherwise the music rights owner gets credit for said content. Now, I don't know what music that was being played but I hope it wasn't copyrighted for the sake of said YouTube community members attending said event.

I did how ever attend a local gathering lure up an area and walk around hatching eggs and catching as many pokemon in the window time frames and suffered heat stroke in the end. It got up to 106 where I live and the best place to play was down by the river as the river kinda helped the heat not be so hot. I am not complaining by any means. I am just sharing my experience. I been looking forward to this event since it was announced. main reason being that July 22, 2016 I had L5S1 Fusion surgery on my back shortly after the game was released. I had walked 5k before surgery and currently I have 599.7k walked. I am level 31. You can view mass evolves on my youtube AuntBeeDoesGames if you wanna see me  progress as well as you can follow me on Instagram frogluvrks to see my progress on the game as well as you can see me struggling through my fibromyalgia and recovery from my surgery. Of course I also suffer from a few other ailments but we won't get into that here. Anyway this game has given me the want to get up and move/go and keep pushing myself to hatch eggs and be social and just get out there and go.

I appreciate the game so much, I am learning stuff about Pokemon that I never got into until Pokemon go came out because I knew how addicted I could get to collecting them all lol. So I never picked up the card games or anything.

Anyways. Sorry a  short rant about the Pokemon go fest and the music they played at the event after inviting the YouTube Community to come and play and record. Please correct me if I am wrong about the music not being copyrighted...

Sincerely,
Rabeka Jo

Attention Product manufacturers abroad!

I am looking for a manufacturer who would like a honest review of their products. If interested in having me try your products so I can give you and the world an honest upfront review of your product that may increase sales of your items, contact me! I am risking spam here so if I end up receive spam I will be forced to shut down the link and you will have to seek me out some way some how to send me your requests.

Look through my blog and see if you are up to the challenge. I am honest and upfront on all my reviews so do keep that in mind. I apologize ahead of time if I have little nice things to say about your product, but this is the only way I know how to be and that is honest. So if you don't want the usual brown nosing blog posts hire me! I will try your products for free! And write a honest review so  you know and consumers know what they are getting with your product.

Thank you for your consideration!
Sincerely,
Rabeka Jo D

p.s. I will take payments via paypal as well if you could pay me for my services...thank you in advance. Still debating on making a paypal me link or not...stay tuned for that link can't figure out if this is service or not if so then I would need to create business paypal and be subject to charges per transaction so I will have to charge a standard rate fee for each transaction including a invoice and all that...thank you for your inquires and patience. God Bless and have a great rest of your day and even better day tomorrow! <3

Laminate Flooring

After spending thousands of money to put this flooring down in my kitchen and dining room with kids we realized just how hard it was to keep liquid from getting on this flooring. If untended wetness gets on it...it warps...OK so why do they even make this crap? Whose roofs never leak? Whose plumbing never fails? And whose kids never spill a drop while getting liquids to drink or pour on food to eat? If I just described you and your home then Laminate flooring is the exact flooring for you...if not then look for something else to floor your very active floors with because you will end up with warped scratched up junk on your floors that looked so beautiful when you first installed it and wasn't living on it just yet.
I think it should be illegal to sell this piece of shit flooring! I really do! Obviously sir at the store who sold me this flooring knew full and well I had kids cuz I had one with me while looking for the perfect flooring for our family home. No warnings about liquids causing warping nothing just a fat check to their company as if to say "suckers" as we left and awaited the delivery and installation of said flooring...I love the slick flooring so I can easily clean up and mop and get things looking new again but I HATE the warp spots that are eye sores. Such a waste of time and energy and most of all money.
So if you are looking for a family dwelling home flooring...DO NOT get laminate flooring the wood look does look so nice but it wont for long once a family is living on it. Find something else maybe tiles maybe those roll out rubbery I forget what kind it is called...just not these chunks of wood that piece together and form a beautiful floor that will never be as beautiful as the day it was installed.

I am very disappointed and once we get to the point that we are tripping over said warp spots and its a hazard we will seek out some other type of flooring that is actually water proof and never look back to laminate flooring.
Thank you for reading my review.
Want me to try something out for me to give a review for comment and suggest it below.
I will be happy to try anything out and give my honest opinion about just about everything.
and as you can tell by my blog here I am highly opinionated. Be sure to subscribe to my blog and get my latest reviews on things, movies, etc.

Talk soon,
Sincerely,
Rabeka Jo D

Trappey Black eyes peas and Texas style cornbread meal review

I used this recipe but not completely to what it says because I used trappey canned black eyed peas. http://www.food.com/recipe/best-ever-black-eyed-peas-50159/review?ic1=obinsite I added two tsp sugar, onion chopped in small cubes, 1 tsp garlic powder, dash of salt and pepper, and cube cut left over ham. I cooked them to a simmer and stirred periodically, until the onions were translucent (seeming see through). 

Then for the cornbread used the Texas style cornbread mix (sorry forgot the brand but I will edit this post later when I get the name so stay tuned). I added the optional tsp sugar to the batter and filled muffin cups half way full...in gas oven I cooked for 10 mins instead of 15-20 as the product instructions said. Just because I know my cookies burnt when following instructions to shortest time recommended. They came out delicious!

Best black eyed peas I've had (but doesn't compare to my grandma and moms recipe whatever that was.) and best cornbread too! Goodbye jiffy cornbread mixes!

My oldest son loved them and had left overs today so it's a winner in the kid department according to my ten year old. My eight year old is a picky eater so you guessed it he took one bite and refused (of course he ate a big bowl of icecream while we were busy getting this meal together). Anyway. I highly recommend this recipe.

Comment below of you tried my altered recipe and if you enjoyed it! Subscribe and send me a recipe to try out I would gladly review it and post it on here in the future! Thanks guys for reading my blog! Have a blessed 2014 year!

Talk to you all later!

Sincerely,

Rabeka Jo

Ps. Forgot to take pictures darn it! Oh well it's all gone now so no going back now...may have to redo the recipe in the future and take pictures this time lol 

Bacon Turkey Review and Reynolds Oven Bag review

Well I thought I would take a shot at the Bacon Turkey this year, one recipe can be found here. But I did more like this guy only I didn't put the veggies or stuffing in the bird I just buttered it with those cups of garlic butter (2 pkg.) you get from papa johns yeah I am lazy lmao. This bird was 23.08 lbs I used all but three pieces of a lb of bacon to cover the bird. I used the Reynolds Oven bag. I also mistakenly left the neck and sack of whatever in it, but I took one sack out and thought I had gotten it all out so oh well, you live you learn and this being my first bird, I think I did OK. Maybe next time I will use turkey bacon lol I really don't know though, may do the basket weave type layer of bacon that I seen, just wanted to throw this together and be done. We had been defrosting this sucker for three of four days and it still was frozen so we had to defrost it in the clean sink for a couple hours before we could even attempt to prepare it so yeah just threw the bacon on didn't have time to basket weave this time...next time we won't get this big of a turkey. I am not even sure where we got this one, I know my husband didn't buy it, it had to of been given to us, like we won it or was a family that got donated to for something or another. Who knows but never again will we have such a huge bird, it was awkward, it was hard to manage and maneuver into the bag etc. Just somethings to think about before attempting such a recipe. Oh thought I would mention we cooked it for 2 and a half hours and seen the plastic indicator thingy was popped out but we went ahead and cooked it the whole 3 hours like the recipe said, for the this size of turkey just for good measure. And we checked the temp and it was over 165 which is the food handling requirements for such type meat because of food poisoning. Anyways we checked the bird body and the leg and yeah both measured over that mark so it was good to go.

OK here is the before cooking pictures:

 So the bacon kind of shifted a bit when we placed it in the bag, so maybe we should have listen to the guy in the video about how to put the bird into the bag before draping the bacon on the turkey, who knows, oh well.

Here is the finished product...look at all that broth/bacon grease mixture (We put it over the sink over a pan and poked a hole in the corner hanging off there and drained it into the pan, and tilted the bird and bag so that most the juice would drain out the hole before we cut the bird out of the bag) there was so much broth/grease in the bag our little cookie sheet wouldn't have caught hardly any of it had we just cut into the bag as instructed in the video.

So the Bag actually stuck to the bacon a bit...but we managed to get most the bacon to come off the bag and stay on the bird.

Here is my dinner plate with the sides we had. I have to say it was a waste of bacon as I was not able to handle to eat the turkey skin that molded to the bacon, but I have to admit the bird was moist and tasted pretty darn good, tough I really don't know if it was actually the bacon or the broth from the turkey that made it moist and taste good, I honestly couldn't taste the bacon. Oh well it was delicious none the less and my first bird I ever cooked (well, got assisted in my attempt in cooking it, by my loving husband) So I give the recipe four out of five stars just because of the bacon I so looked forward in eating, ended up being uneatable in the end. Oh well...

As for the Reynolds oven bag, I floured it like it said to but it still stuck to the bacon, I don't know if its because it wasn't the bird, it was bacon, or what, just know it stuck pretty good to the bacon. Not sure if it would stick to just the Turkey bird or chicken bird whichever you use it for...but I do have to say I didn't burn my bird and its very much juicy. I will use it again to try it without the bacon (maybe a chicken in the future) and see if it sticks then. So stay tuned for that, subscribe, who knows when I will post again with that, and what will be next to try out.

Thank you for reading my review hope it was helpful to you, Good luck in your attempt at this recipe, maybe next time I will try to do it the foil way instead of the bag, I just had a oven bag and thought may as well use it. Anyway thanks again have a good day.

Have a suggestion for me to try out something? Comment it below and I will see what I can do, then subscribe so you don't miss my review if I choose yours! Stay tuned for more from me and my family reviewing things, games, recipes, and more!

Black Wii review and Lego Wii games

My family and I bought a new Black Wii to replace our old White Wii that we bought when the Wii's first came out. I didn't think they would back step technology but THEY TOTALLY DID!
Nintendo actually removed the gamecube ports from the side of the Wii and instead of being able to transfer all your game data from the SD card you have to put in each game ONE BY ONE and go into Wii settings menu then data management then wii console then SD card tab then find the game you want to copy and copy it...so freaking crazy for someone who has tons of games...So anyways.
I never liked the Lego games way of saving things because its so easy to overwrite especially with children who didn't know how to read which those days are thankfully over now but man having to restart Lego games from the start after nearly completing them was such a frustrating hissy fit by my children because of the accidental overwrite happening...I even tried saving the data to the SD card but found in the end was that I had to remove the SD card to prevent it from being overwritten on the SD card too...so a whole lot of good that did NOT. Anyways.

So I just sent an email to Nintendo and this is what my letter said:


Why did you remove the gamecube ports from the wii consoles? I bought the black one and I been down and out cause of major surgery and I am finally released from my doctor to be able to get back into my normal activities and wanted to play some Dance Dance Revolution the other night only to try and try and try to get that hatch that used to be at the top of my old white wii to find there was none there which to me is dumb instead of advancing in your technology you took a giant step back and to me that is the most stupid move you could have EVER done. I suggest you recall all wii consoles that don't have the ports so us people who didn't get around to figuring out that it didn't have these ports for whatever reason it may have been and replace them with ones that do have the ports. Another thing I would like to complain about is the inability to just copy all the game progress on all games that are copied to the SD card...yes thats a great feature to be able to transfer our game progress to our new wii's but to have to put every single game into it one by one to transfer all the game progress is a bit redundant and unnecessary and I am even more angry about that whole deal. Lastly I always have to mention the load save options on Lego games are way too easy to be written over and should be able to back up the games progress on the SD card and not be touched...but I found if I leave the SD card plugged in the new game progress overrides both the console and the SD card so all data is lost unless the SD card is removed and not accessible to the games which being absent minded is a typical users trait and should have been considered in the design of the way things operate in the system. Alright.
Please let me know if there are some type of adapters that we can get since I have invested hundreds of dollars in the complete set of DDR with multiple dance mats and am extremely angry over this, especially if nothing will be done to resolve the issues soon. You create something then take a step back in your technology, thats dumb. Advancing technology does make more sense doesn't it? Standing by your product come hell or high water is the way to get and keep customers. I hate that products today cost so damn much only to be built to last till the warranty wears out 2 years down the line so we are forced to buy new...I miss the old days where it was cheap and they stood by their products and they were built to last decades! heck my super nintendo lasted all these years and still going strong today and I got mine when they first came out just like I did the white wii...I am losing my confidence in your company and thoroughly regret my purchasing this black wii especially if this doesn't get resolved quickly. I can't help that I didn't check for ports I assumed they were there if not more different type ports cause you can't ever step back in technology but I stand corrected on that assumption.
Thank you for your time and understandings that I am very angry over the whole ordeal. I wish I hadn't have had to have that emergency surgery and could have found out sooner than now but it was an emergency and now I think I am stuck with a wii that is inoperable to suit my needs.
I will be contacting by phone to fix the sync issues with the wii balance board soon as it is not syncing even with reset buttons pressed on both console and balance board which is plugged in via battery power pack...and also reconnected through wii remote reconnect option in the menu...nothing...again fear its another step back in technology if it isn't resolved...again thank you for your time.
God Bless and do pass this on to the head people because they really need to hear this feedback if they are wanting to continue being the leading console provider to the USA
Sincerely,
Rabeka Jo





OK so stay tuned to see what they have to say to that...but I can kind of guess what they are going to say. We regretfully have to inform you that all sales are final and there are no plans of bringing back the gamecube ports to the Wii. As for game issues you will need to contact the game creators to see about getting a correction jack for your dance mats or whatever...you know the same cop out crap I always get from writing to big company's help emails...but they may surprise me and actually fix the issues...OK thats the hopeful side of my wishful thinking speaking but ya know I really have lost hope in today's technology. I swear when you buy something for THAT much money it HAS to be better than the 50 dollar Super Nintendo you bought years ago that is still up and running...and if they come out with new consoles after the first prototype its gotta be improved not degraded like it was in this case! I really wish I would have bought the Xbox 360 and Kinect set up instead of another Wii but we had so much money invested in games its sick! and anywhere you can trade your games into to get new games they rip you off so bad it makes me sick to even think about taking all my games there to get less than half of what I paid for them brand new...sure they are opened...they can be resurfaced for a buck and play like brand new...yet stupid resale shops can't give much towards your pocket...its a ridiculous world we live in where us the consumers have no choice in how much we pay for items used or new because we feel we HAVE to have some items that are really not necessarily then where it really counts like Gas and Electricity and all the things you have to have to be able to live comfortably in your own home...yeah thats where they rape us the worst...and they know they can raise it to whatever heights they desire and we will just bend over and take it because we have no choice on the matter...with games and crap we don't necessarily need them but they sure do help one escape from life for the short time we play them and give us a false sense of accomplishment when we beat a stage or total game for that matter...virtual medals and stars and prizes for our virtual treehouse or home or whatever the prizes are on whatever games you play... Farmville is one of my worst life drainers that and angry birds and Castleville trying to beat quests and beat the high score of my friends and yeah never ending crops to be mastered so I can get a sign on Farmville...yeah wow totally life draining but as I said its a great escape for many...and yeah we have no choice but to pay whatever whoever is in charge of prices decides to put on the games and systems we play them on. Anyways...
I may try and take the Wii back to Walmart and see about getting one with ports...it should state on the box that it has them or not...thats just rediculous that I didn't even notice till now but of course I haven't been able to play my games I normally play because of emergency surgery that I had to have done and just now am simi released to try and see what I can still do and can't so I am going to try and do what I love and see how it goes...I may not even be able to be able to play DDR after its all said and done but who knows I am hopeful.
Anyways talk to you all later...just had to vent about that...thanks for listening.